Tuesday, November 30, 2010


I sit here
wondering what's real,
if you'll be like this
or like that,
really I'm discovering
parts of myself.
And that's what makes it
so exquisite.
I look for you, I see me.
I look for me, and I see you.

Monday, November 29, 2010

confessions p.5

She* said it would hurt,
and it does,
and I can...
I can be a great desert,
barren abyss, light-less.
I can be empty spaces
or Robert Frost's "desert places".
I can be the inertia of sleep,
I can taste everything
that I dislike, within myself.
And I will hurt,
and this heart will break,
and I can spend my moments
in lethargic nostalgia,
trying to pick up the pieces.


Or I can find that heart of hearts
in the spaces between moments,
throw it in abandon to the wind,
and I can laugh
in the face of each heartbreak.
And laughing, I can greet
each of Rumi's "daily guests,"
even sorrow and melancholy
will get their chuckle,
because there is something
in my soul that cannot be defined
in any emotional state,
some magical alchemy
that wants to flood out every day,
like pure being,
or the opposite of fear...

-Robert Frost's Desert Places:  http://www.internal.org/Robert_Frost/Desert_Places
-Rumi's the Guest House:  http://www.panhala.net/Archive/The_Guest_House.html

*the "She" in the opening line is a reference to this song:

Tuesday, November 23, 2010


Your kiss, lips circling
hovering soul speak
left hemisphere choke
motion merges to picture.
The sun kisses my face
solar eclipse at the mouth
hands wielding time, frozen
tasting the honesty in your tongue
the hope in your breath.
Reason fails here, lids shut
thoughts nestle, like jigsaw pieces
till I don't know your eyes from mine.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

tasting worlds

i have these vivid moments
when i see my words, my thoughts
captured in the stillness of an image
an endless sea 
of all the people i know
and maybe will know
each of them holds a world in his/her hands
each is a world in her/his right
in each lie untold possibilities
from each a particular light emanates
through each a thousand branches unfurl
and i, unrecognizable
drunk from everyone's fire
looking for that raging inferno
that endless drop
that setless sun
 into which I can disappear

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

my resolution

wish that i could let go.
wish that i could let u know.
i'm broken at the seams.
i'm in this all alone.
i've become almost ephemeral,
my center's become undone,
and there's no time, no extensions.
i'm sitting here sifting through words,
and bittersweet memories,
tired of being nostalgic,
tired of this ration that privilege has doled out to me,
and most of all, tired of being tired.
and i know there's no time,
no one gets extensions,
i'm here now and already gone,
this moment started and is already done.
i'm lost now and already found
in the spaces between moments,
looking for myself through your eyes.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

confessions p. 4

I turned away from the guests to the kitchen for a moment to gather a wet cloth and clean the spill.  I turned on the tap, and as the water flowed over my hands, I felt a sudden wave, of something intense, almost indescribable. The whole night flashed before my eyes, every single beautiful, unsaid detail, every little trembling accumulation of this overwhelming now.  What rapture there can be in the ordinary.  What rapture, in simplicity.

the confinement of words p.4

I sit here, juggling words
with hands that don't even work
because of this torrent in my chest
How can I weigh words
I have been made weightless
How can I make sense
when I have been struck senseless
How can I be coherent
when there is so much beauty around me?
Now, all I want is silence...

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Une Affaire de Coeur

I don't know how
under what guise
with what intent.
I've known no time
other than now
I've known no place
but here, the heart.
Given so much
in so little
from nothingness
'come everything.
Immersed in love
'round faithlessness.
Struck still in that
ascent of breath.
So much, know not
only knowing
that I, from naught
now standing on
the precipice
to everything.
There was no fear
during all this
nor certitude
no doubt, ego
no sense of self
nor greater whole.
I don't know how
under what guise
with what intent
from nothingness
I've come to taste
this endlessness.
I've known no time
other than now
I've known no place
but here, the heart.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

we've already known each other

I saw you like a face in a passing car.
Like someone picking out a familiar
voice in dark room of strangers.
I saw you like an intimate touch
stirring memories in my pores,
like a smell that grabs and throws
you down a forgotten alleyway,
or an unspoken language that seeps,
like water, through parched lips.
I saw you like a random reflection
of myself, like the residue
of an unborn photograph.
I see you now with closed eyes,
and it's as though each part of my body
becomes a hundred eyes
soaking in your being.

the faceless

For eons, I've searched
for your face.
Every taste of your trace,
is like life and death
in the same breath.
So long, I've listened
for your voice,
till tongue and ear 'come one.
If night and day
were man and woman,
it would be your song
that compels their feet into dance,
and sets the motion of the stars.
If a rose had hands
in the place of thorns,
it would uproot itself
at a (mere) hint of your glance.
If the sun could see
it would become your moon
and lay at your feet,
begging for just one glimpse.

If non-existence
could become existence,
then "I love you"
could mean "I love me" too...